asegfvdrg_b.gifWhat’s your competency? Any employer will let you know about it, but how to be with motherhood? After it is even harder, than most difficult work. How to know whether you can cope with it? Arrange an examination on your professional parental suitability and learn what you can.

Most likely, many will agree that it is not difficult to become parents. For this purpose you should not have either a certain position in a society, or life experience. Nobody will ask to show your diploma of vocational education, when you take away a baby from maternity home. Nobody will arrange an examination on your professional parental suitability. The question is how to become good parents? It is hard. Why?

Reasons of complexity

1. You will learn this nowhere

We do not talk about school or any other educational institutions of general character. After all, the subject is - how to bring up a child correctly, to help him becoming a Person. It is a question of how to understand his problems and troubles, find common language with him, grow up a useful citizen of society. Agree, this is not so easy.

2. Absence of motivation

Secondly, we do not have special desire to receive knowledge in this area. We are not accustomed to it either by our parents, or society we live in. In many respects we receive our knowledge of children education in a family where we were brought up. They say «like father like son». We behave ourselves in relation to our children the way we were brought up by our parents. But here it is necessary to reflect that, maybe our children deserve better relation. After all, these are our children! Whether it is possible to correct this situation? Certainly it is. There should be a desire and aspiration.

What to do, to become good parents for your children?

1. Search the best example and best council

Good parents are ready to search for council to bring up their children better. Where should you search? There are people who are able, at least, to try being good parents and they are successful in it. You can see this through results of their work, their children, their children’s families. Perhaps, there are such people among your relatives, colleagues or friends? If you see and know results of their children’s education, you can learn from them how they do it. What person will not want to impart experience and knowledge in this area with you, if you can estimate his efforts on advantage and, having told him about it, ask some councils on this theme.

2. Be cautious with literature

It is certainly possible to address to corresponding literature: various books, recommendations of teachers, but here you should be cautious. Cautious in respect that today there is a lot of councils about it and you can find literature everywhere. Believe that many councils of those who consider themselves as experts in this business, contradict each other at times. The main criterion are results these or that methods of children education lead to. Therefore here it is necessary to be 100 % assured that we choose right education methods, differently consequences can be pitiable.

3. Be an example

This is a very important point in chidlren’s education, it is difficult to overestimate it. It is not necessary to learn children to a principle «do like me», they do this practically since birth. Therefore throughout all time of child education, his formation as a person, you can bring up a daughter or son thtough your behaviour.

Sometimes it happens that someone says about our children: «dead spit of his/her father/mother» and this similarity noticed by other people, it not only external. Our children adopt our manner to speak, laugh, joke. They imitate us (since early age) in the way we behave with relatives, other people, neighbours. Children notice all our habits and, without suspecting, start to imitate them, because parents are the most important authority for them in early age.

4. Avoid «double standards»

Do you know, what disorient a child most of all? What irritates him, destabilises him in perception of world around and drops our authority in his eyes? If our words are out of sync with our affairs. If we teach a child one thing and result a very convincing argument in favour of it, and then our child sees or hears, how we act in another way. In this case all our words can appear not only useless, but even harmful.

Such tactics of behaviour, tactics of “double standards” irritates us when we face it in life (maybe on work or somewhere else). But in much bigger degree such behaviour of “double standards” irritates our children and does not do us honour as to their parents.

Well and to make your child seeing your example, it is necessary …

5. Find time for a child

Children require it. They miss, when we are not present, when we leave somewhere, when we work a lot. And though we work to provide our children with all necessary for life, it is important to remember that our children require not only meal, clothes, entertainment subjects, but also first of all our attention, time, councils and understanding.

Certainly, depending on age, requirements of our children vary. But if we wish to have close and confidential relations, they need to be arranged since early childhood. Then, when our children mature, have awkward age, thanks to good exchange of thoughts and confidential relations, we will be able to help them. Since childhood they will get used to the fact that their parents always find time for them, ready to postpone their affairs to listen to a child. And all this happens because parents love their children and prove them their love in word and deed.